PopeWatch: Torture

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VATICAN-POPE-AUDIENCE

From the only reliable source of Catholic news on the net, Eye of the Tiber:

 

ROME –  Pope Francis led a pep rally yesterday in Rome’s Olympic Stadium in front of more than 50,000 Catholics who follow charismatic movements.

While listening to what many have termed “the most heinous music ever prayed to,” 50,000 Catholics raised their hands in unison as they prayed for Francis, who silently and repeatedly asked God Almighty to just make it stop.

Francis told the faithful that the devil wants to destroy the family, which he described as the “domestic church,” and went on to plead for the end of the use of torture.

“We also call on the international community to put a stop to the torture of prisoners. I’m guessing that this is why this music is playing in the background. That we may know what it is to suffer excruciating pain.”

Francis told the crowd that when he was Buenos Aires Archbishop, at first he didn’t “share” the way the exuberant charismatic Catholics prayed there, but now realized that he still has not changed his mind, going on to encourage everyone to man up and stop crying already.

Many in the crowd, we think, told EOTT while speaking in tongues that they were thrilled by the visit, saying, “Я тоже не знаю, что говорю.”  Another woman said that “In realta’, non so quello che sto facendo adesso,” while her husband concurred with whatever the heck his wife said, adding, “Ich glaube, ich bete für euch gerade jetzt, aber ich kann nicht sicher sein.”

“It was wonderful to see him there,” said Donetta Corti, a charismatic Catholic living in Rome, as she swayed back and forth with one hand in the air like some doped up hippy just moments after taking a hit of that sweet, sweet ganja. “The entire experience appeared to overwhelm His Holiness as it does most every newcomer. Many times you could see him slumped over, vomiting, and asking God to just stop it and to put him out of his misery. It was obvious the man wanted to die a martyr. What humility…to plead to God on your knees in front of 50,000 people to end the misery of the world…to vomit because the pain and suffering in the world touches him at such a deep level.

Toward the end of the event, Francis invited members of the charismatic movement to the Vatican for a prayer service, adding that there were many people in the curia and Vatican Bank that he would like to have “sit through this” as a warning to never act out of line again.

 

When contacted for a comment, Pope Francis said: Mi ankoraŭ opinias ke ili estas vere sambo dancistoj!

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11 Comments

  1. This post is absolutely hysterical! Although as a former member (for 10 + years of a Charismatic Church) I can indeed verify that being overcome by the presence of the Lord through the presence of the Holy Spirit truly has me behaving as if I am drunk or stoned. In fact, I will sob for an hour under the influence of the Holy Spirit in worship. And it doesn’t matter where I am at the given time–at home, driving around in my car, in a church pew, praying with someone in need, praying with a friend, watching the Gaithers & singing hyms on Sat night, etc.

  2. Sooo, I’ll bite: what language is “Mi ankoraŭ opinias ke ili estas vere sambo dancistoj!”? Or did you go one further than the original and use multiple languages, like some Charismatics I’ve know claim to do?

  3. Should I click on that link, Don? Is it from that movie Shatner made just before Star Trek which has a name I’d be a little uncomfortable with posting here, at least on a thread with a comedic theme? hehe

  4. The problem for me personally is this movement both catholic pentecostal and renewal charismatics do not know scriptures. Ask any of them a few years ago where is slain in the spirit in the gospels they could not tell you and their answers gave me a great deal of amusement. They could not even admit where I told them it was as it would have made them have to admit in a very exaggerated manner that God dealt in death of the soul. One American pentecostal pastor was beside himself with anger at the accusation I made that he killed souls. Almost immediately they changed it to resting in the spirit. Well their slain in the spirit is in the passion of John and the Acts of the Apostles. When the sinful villains attacked Christ in the garden demanding where is Christ. He said “I am He” and they all fell down. When the Holy Spirit God’s supernatural Love and Sanctifying grace raised Him from the dead and he left the Tomb the guards were stupified.
    Now we look at their mistaken and disobedience to St Paul. First Saul on his way to Damascus to slaughter Christians was smashed from his horse and was blind and in a impious coma for some time. Talk about slain in the spirit maybe it should be
    by not in. There is a book out there concerning a retreat given by I believe the Our Lady of Salette priestly order in a Boston Hospital where a missionary told of her problems with pride. This Nun was slain in the spirit for several hours and the next day she commented on her sin of pride and disobedience. She had a true gift of tongues and was I would think a polyglot. She was sent under the charge of another sister to establish a medical outpost in an out of the way place. She quickly learnt the local dialect and misled the senior sister on what the locals needed by substituting what she wanted them to have. Thus she had already slain her soul. Now Paul says if no one understands you shut up us we will all think you are crazy. Do they, shut up I mean? On a more personal note and before I express my personal feelings, I often go to a local Catholic Group run by the usual conglomerate of Spiritual Alphas, when we were doing the usual act of the alcoholics Anonymous round table. I said I prayer I use often based on the prayer before the Crucifix which starts Look down from the Cross on all here present for whom I pray and in Thy presence and before Thy face I prostrate my soul in humble supplication…. Two Spirituals jumped up and spluttered and hissed like riled Asps. My inner voice said, “My Goodness they are praying to Seraph” a little later I heard, ” They are asking to fornicate with the Devil” I told them I could translate what they were saying. What happiness and then I told them what they had said. My Goodness what a scene and a dismissal of their previous delight in my words.
    The speech they used described by St Jerome as beasts in the farmyard can be found in the older more truer translations of the Old Testament. After all I maintain satan has been there before. Look in Isaiah chapter 18 where we now say command, command use to be written as bzz, byzz. byzz a sirt of bronx cheer. The old foot notes used to say in words that could not be translated. Why was it changed??

  5. something I wish to add to my previous comment. I believe many of the rank and file of the catholic people who go to these meetings are genuinely good people seeking community prayer but are led astray by many things upon which they trust. One the Parish priests allow these groups with adequate supervision, two they claim authority for their actions a they are recognized by the Congregation for the Laity. They can of course be recognized as catholic Laity but it is the Congregation of the Defense of the faith and Divine Worship who are the arbiters of Catholic Theology, whose theology as St JP2 called it a childish theology and they should return to their parishes and practice the corporal and spiritual works of mercy. The do have a reputation of lacking this perspective of Catholic Life.

  6. Mike Hurcum: the Bible is filled with examples of Satan counterfeiting things that God. Prime examples are in the book of Exodus where Pharoh’s sorcerers/magicians reproduced by satanic power–some of the exact same miracles that Moses had performed by God’s power. I think it is fairly well known that Satan worshipped speak in Unkown tongues during their Satanic worship services. The Bible also says clearly says that Christians speak in tongues by the power if the Holy Spirit. My point is–if you discount activities that are similar just because there are examples of Satan counterfeiting those activities–you are going to miss the activities that are carried out by the power of God.

    Re: the “slain in the spirit” bologna. I, as well, have pointed out to people that the only people who were slain by the Spirit in the scripture were stone cold dead as a result of their sin.

    Re: being so overcome by the presence of the Holy Spirit that you literally fall down & it takes you a while to be able to regain control over your body again–that has happened to me–you literally don’t know it is about to happen or that it is even happening until it is over–and the peace you feel is so overwhelming & complete that there literally is no word in the Engish language of which I am aware to describe that kind of peace.

    Is it something to be sought? I am not aware of any passage of scripture that says it is.

    The scripture says that speaking in tongues is also one of the lesser gifts and that the other gifts which edify all are to be sought.

  7. I also wanted to point out that scripture clearly says that Christians ate to do things decently and in order during worship. All of the activities/manifestations of the Holy Spirit that I mentioned experiencing have NEVER once caused anything indecent or out of order even during a public worship service. Those type of demonstrations of the Spirit obviously would be completely disruptive & disorderly in the mass at our local Catholic service. I have been told that some Catholics have spoken in tongues when taking the Eucharist, but I have never experienced that happening in a mass. If it does happen in a mass, according to the scripture since there is no interpreter–the person speaking in tongues should be quiet.

    I have read a discussion of whether or not people are hard wired to raise their arms in the air when they are exhilarated, excited, have conquered something, are worshiping or giving glory & praising something other than themselves. The consensus of the article was that we are hard wired to raise our arms in worship & other similar activities. The behaviour of winning athletes ( raising of arms in the air,) the behaviour of many Protestants in worship (raising of arms,) & the behaviour of sports fans in sports stadiums were given as examples.

    It is difficult for me to not raise my hands in worship no matter where I am. I do not do this during mass for the sake of order & decency–not that I think it is indecent to raise your arms in the air in worship–but because many present in the mass would see it as being an indecent disruption.

    Often during mass I feel the presence & power of the Holy Spirit in a very real, tangible form–so strongly that I have to bow my head & close my eyes–often worshipping in the pew during the homily or music–and almost always when I am approaching the Eucharist in line–and almost always after haven taken the Eucharist on my way back to the pew or having returned to the pew. The presence and power of the Holy Spirit is like water to a man dying of thirst in the desert–it heals the wounds I have received and teaches me the path I need to take in many areas of life as well as convicting me of sin and enabling confession while assuring me of the faithfulness & love that God the Father has for me as His child!
    GLORY TO GOD FOR HIS LOVE AND WORK IN AND THROUGH US TO FUFILL HIS PROMISE TO US THAT HE WILL BE THE AUTHOR AND FINISHER OF OUR FAITH!!! To Him alone be glory only.

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