PopeWatch: Liturgical Strippers

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From the most intentionally funny Catholic site on the net, Acts of the Apostasy:

 

Earlier in the week, I read one of the stranger headlines I’d seen in awhile: China Vows to Crack Down on Funeral Strippers.

My first thought was, um…what? My second thought was, I had no idea Hugh Hefner was buried in China!

From the article:

The culture ministry set up hotlines to offer monetary rewards for those who report “funeral misdeeds” in 19 cities in Henan, Anhui, Jiangsu and Hebei provinces.

Some rural communities in China believe hiring performers can increase attendance at funerals, with high attendance seen as a way of honouring the deceased.

In a bid to show off their disposable income and boost numbers, some households pay out more than their annual incomes for strippers, but also actors, singers and comedians, the Global Times reported. 

This takes “Dancing on one’s grave” to a whole new level. Or for a comedian to “die up on stage”. And nothing says “I love my recently deceased family member!” like a stripper tossing her clothes to the mourners and wrapping her body around a pole, amirite? 

Generally speaking, I don’t applaud the actions of the Chinese government, with them being communist and oppressive and all that. But in this case I’ll make an exception, and I’d like them to give the USCCB pointers on how to stamp out liturgical dancing. Please? As long as the Chinese are talking to the Vatican, have them chat up the USCCB, too. Granted, liturgical dance isn’t super prevalent, but it does happen. For instance, ever see footage from the LA Religious Education Congress liturgies? Eye bleach moments if ever there were some.

Sure, the USCCB can’t arrest people, or throw them in prison, or send them to secret workcamps. Heck, they don’t even excommunicate people. But there are things they can do: confiscate their taffeta and chiffon outfits; make them cry room monitors; force them to watch Kirk Cameron movies.

Liturgical dance dancing liturgy catholic humor

I know! Tell them there are job openings in China for “liturgical dancers”, IYKWIM.

 

Go here to comment.  PopeWatch was going to call the Vatican and ask if the banning of funeral strippers would have any impact on the Vatican’s negotiations with Red China, but decided that he was too afraid of the answer he might receive to make the call.

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