PopeWatch: Burke

VATICAN-POPE-AUDIENCE

 

From the only reliable source of Catholic news on the net, Eye of the Tiber:

 

Akron, OH–Pope Francis has reportedly planned to remove Cardinal Raymond Burke from head of the Apostolic Signatura, demoting him to the largely ceremonial role as Head Chaplain for the Akron RubberDucks minor league baseball team.

Although his removal from the Roman Curia (the body of Vatican-based Cardinals who are close advisers to the Pope,) appears to be a slight to many conservative Catholics, some Akron-based Catholic  RubberDucks fans believe Burke’s new role as chaplain and adviser to the minor league team will help revitalize the beloved Double-A affiliate of the Cleveland Indians.

President of the Akron RubberDucks Jacob Wallace told EOTT this morning that the team has been playing liberally in the past few years, and that it was time for a change. “We need to begin playing a lot more conservative…the way we used to play when were winning,” Wallace said. “We believe that his spiritual impact on the team will help us reduce errors. I have personally spoken to Cardinal Burke and he has assured me that there will no longer be anymore stealing bases. Anyone caught stealing will be removed from the team immediately. If we’re going to win, we’re going to win with integrity.”

Burke, who is not only a liturgical conservative, but also a baseball conservative, is also expected to change the RubberDucks jersey back to the old-fashioned retro jerseys the team wore when it was founded in 1997.

When asked to comment, Pope Francis responded, Burke who?

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7 Comments

  1. This coincides with the news from Vatican City; “Pope Francis is demoting himself and asking for former Pope Benedict XVI to guide the Holy Church.
    When asked why, Pope Francis said the Nuns on the Bus tour is in need of a driver, and he always wanted to drive a bus.”

    This news might interfere with Akron’s new Chaplin assignment.

    Let’s hope it does.

  2. Philip: You’ve got talent.
    .
    When Padre Pio was forbidden to speak with the gentry by his superiors, the villagers came with pitch forks and rakes, shovels and sickels. Padre Pio appeared at his window and was forever there. It is that time, again.

  3. Philip: all those years riding the buses in Argentina, and never getting to drive the buses.

    Mary: I can bring a trenching spade. Lead the way.

  4. Mary De Voe.

    Thank you Mary for the complement, however humility and charity we’re buried by my eagerness to be cleaver.

    Your mention of Padre Pio sparked a desire to search out his counsels and exhortations. You are right about our time, and the great truth that he is still in our midst. “Forever there.”

    I hope you appreciate this pearl.

    “Humility and purity of conduct are the wings which raise us up to God and in a matter deify us. Remember this: the sinner who is ashamed to do evil is closer to God than the upright man who is ashamed to do good.”

    With that I ask you to join thousands praying for the end of black masses being promoted. The Eucharistic Procession will be happening tonight to make visible the presence of Him who gives us breaths. The black mass at the Civic Center will not win the day!

    Thank you in advance!

    PS. Today is the 96th anniversary of Padre Pio’s Stigmata. What a great way to use Pio help to fight tonights black mass.

  5. Philip: “PS. Today is the 96th anniversary of Padre Pio’s Stigmata. What a great way to use Pio help to fight tonights black mass.”
    .
    We are helping Saint Pio to fight the black mass. Thank you for this information.
    .
    Philip, You are worth every compliment I offer and then some.

  6. Tamsin: Trenching spades are good. I will see you there.
    .
    The essence of God is existence. Pope Francis may get run over by the Nuns on the Bus and their absent compassion for the newly conceived human beings, body and soul, in existence in the womb.

  7. Mary De Voe.

    It is true that we are humbled by the generosity of God. I would only add this; and by those that love God.

    Thank you for your comments.

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