Hillary Clinton is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.

News that I missed courtesy of  The Babylon Bee:


A note from the editorial board at The Babylon Bee:

A number of people have questioned our love for Hillary Clinton based on some satirical pieces published on our site recently.

We would like to clear things up by saying that Hillary Clinton is an upstanding citizen and a very fine human being. She is of excellent character. She would never hurt anyone. The people who wrote those jokes, headlines, and pieces that seemed to criticize Hillary have been dealt with.

Some conspiracy theories have been going around about the Clintons, and we think that’s just despicable. Deplorable, really. From Bill’s time in the White House all the way through Hillary’s spotless record as Secretary of State, the Clintons have served this country with honor and not a hint of scandal. For people to suggest they are so powerful and sinister to kill those who might expose some non-existent “wrongdoings” in their past is treason, really.

We just want to make certain that it’s clear how much we respect, love, and honor the Clintons. Honestly, they’re our favorite politicians of all the politicians, way better than that Trump guy. It’s a real shame Hillary didn’t win. She’s our president.

Above all, we want to make sure Hillary does not question our loyalty to her and the whole Clinton family. We have nothing bad to say about her. Also, just to be clear, we have no dirt or inside information on her whatsoever and nothing would be gained by our untimely deaths.


Go here to read the rest.  I don’t know Bee.  Discretion is sometimes the better part of valor, but I prefer the below reaction to threats:


SPOCK: Why are you monitoring my communications, Mister Sulu?


SULU: My security board has detected extensive use of computer, Mister Spock. I was about to inform you.

[Spock’s quarters]

SULU [OC]: It’s not hard to guess the nature of your order from Starfleet Command. I suggest a connection. The captain suspects.


SULU: He’s working on escape or defence.

[Spock’s quarters]

SPOCK: That is my concern.


SULU: Correct. It’s your play. I hope you succeed, because the order would fall on me next and you know how Captain Kirk’s enemies have a habit of disappearing.

[Spock’s quarters]

SPOCK: If I am successful, you see yourself a step nearer to the captaincy. I do not want to command the Enterprise, but if it should befall me, I suggest you remember that my operatives would avenge my death and some of them are Vulcans.

Star Trek, Mirror, Mirror, Screenplay

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  1. I’m still giddy about the deer.
    I can imagine one of the Clinton goons coaxing the doe out onto the road with promises of a high position in Bill’s cabinet only to be run over by a black Chevy Suburban. Sure the Park Rangers called it an accident but that doe was doomed. Another victim of the Clinton backwash. Poor thing.

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