Save Us, Saviors of the World

In America today, totalitarians are blest with keen insights, incredible intelligence, and a limitless will to power. Again and again, out of alleged compassion and amazing sensitivity, with no stated desire for prestige or power, they see dangers that threaten all of us about which most of us are clueless. Not only do these self-described-as-unselfish people realize and warn us about world-ending dangers, they pledge to resolve the crisis and devote their whole careers, their very lives, to save ours.

The substance of the various crises they discover, understand, and pledge to deliver us from makes no difference and can be anything –  e.g., peak oil, overpopulation, and global warming. But whatever it is, for their purposes, it must have the potential to end the world as we know it; or, at least, they must be able to say that without a smile.

We – and We Alone – Will Save You From Ice Age Annihilation

Their recognition of and responses to  past warnings of impending global cooling and new ice ages are  fine examples of their selflessness.

In the two most recent past centuries, “The Coming Ice Age Threatens Us All” could be the title of numerous reports about past predictions of worldwide ice ages, based on then-accepted scientific facts and alleged theories. Excerpts from a Boston Globe article, April 16, 1970 are exemplary of a typical “new ice age” threat:

Scientists predict a new ice age by 21^st century . . . Air pollution may obliterate the sun and cause a new ice age in the first third of the next century.

Ice Age Totalitarian Redemption

In totalitarian newspeak and doublethink, a la the 1948 book 1984 by George Orwell, a group of totalitarians in power, or wannabe rulers not yet in power,  would have a message as follows for the non-party citizens, the lesser proles, and almost all of us about the ice age that will end the world without their intervention.  We would see this for what it is, wouldn’t we ? If some today tried this we would not be fooled, would we ?

Attention! Attention!

The goal for camera production in the twelfth ten-year plan has been exceeded by 6.66%. Eveyone responsible for the record-breaking  achievement is to be commended for their hard work and patriotism.

We are at war with China, We have always been at war with China. On the western front we have had a great victory! Our valiant soldiers have killed over one million of the enemy and taken over half a million prisoners. Of the surviving prisoners, about 50,000, treatment at the Minsitry of Love was successful in 2,000 cases. The remaining 48,000 were disposed of.

Newsflash! Newsflash!

Today The Times, courageously  providing all the news fit to be presented to you the people,  has reported that 97 scientists  had  initially put out an alert because they predicted that there would be unusual cooling of some of the land mass of the earth’s middle continents. They have  been researching atmospheric changes, seismic events, population rise, solar flares, earth core eruptions, and tidal changes going back many centuries. But recent re-analysis of the facts, and further computerized  refinement of their data, [with the new 2+2 =3 algorithm] have forced them now to issue a worldwide warning of an impending new global ice age that will result in the extinction of almost all human life on the planet in eight years. The Party is resolved to address and solve this crisis.

The Party cannot do this alone and will join hand-in-hand with all of us in this effort for survival that is not only the duty, but the joyful destiny of every citizen patriot. The sacrifices we all will make will save our earth and our way of life. Each of you, led by the Party,  will realize that individual freedom will ultimately result in slavery and that personal liberty, unchecked, will mean the end of the human race.

Vigilance by all of you will be required since even the new constant surveillance systems may be unable to reveal those who are not patriots, anyone who does not love our people and the Party.

Ministry of Global Solicitude

To deal with the cooling crisis, the Party has formed  a new Ministry Of Global Solicitude which will have power to implement the Party’s solutions for addressing, then gloriously overcoming, this crisis. This will include temporary monitoring of some aspects of our daily lives,  including, in some areas, energy production and consumption, farming, food production and dissemination, manufacturing, labor, transportation, education, healthcare, the economy, financial  institutions,  markets, housing,  child development, waste management, and body disposal  until the crisis is past.

Several generous, selfless inner Party members have  volunteered to leave their present positions and work in the new ministry.   For however long it takes, these devoted Party members will be seen across our beloved nation,  many still  in some of the old and now-outlawed vehicles, necessary to their work. so they can not only serve us all, but save us all.

Cooling Heretics

Three researchers – part of the roiginal group of 100 – guilty of thoughtcrime and scientific heresy  were taken to the Ministry of Love. In their arrogance and self-centeredness, they chose to ignore the facts and they denied the truth as proclaimed by the Party, some in their consummate pride even asserting that there was no crisis.  All of the Party’s extensive and caring rehabilitation and re-education efforts have failed. These three cooling deniers will be executed next week during the Two Minutes Of Hate after they have publicly confessed to their heretical, criminal actions.

Heroism Awarded

The heroic 97 scientists who made the basic discoveries about this crisis will be awarded the Nobility Truth medal at an upcoming Party meeting that will broadcast nationwide.  Big Brother himself will give them their awards. Evidencing their extreme generosity and patriotism, all of them have agreed to work with the Party until all of us and the entire earth itself are again safe.