News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:
HOLLYWOOD, CA—Times have changed in Hollywood since the early days, and no one is learning that lesson harder than industry veteran Donald Duck. Multiple sources have accused him of walking onto movie sets throughout his career without wearing any pants.
Multiple images and videos have emerged supporting these accusations.
“He used to just wander in, yell unintelligibly and get mad at everyone, and then storm off,” said one crew member who worked with Duck in “Donald’s Dilemma.” “And yeah, the whole time he’d be naked from the waist down. I mean, granted, it was a different time, but yeah, looking back, it was really inappropriate.”
Duck lashed out angrily at the accusations, saying it was decades ago and these accusers are simply trying to make a name for themselves.
“Ducks will be ducks,” he said at a press conference, shaking his fist, his face turning red and smoke blowing out his ears. He tried to punch one reporter but accidentally flung himself out the window by mistake. A piano then fell out of nowhere and landed on his head.
“Aw, phooey!” he said.
Go here to read the rest. Nothing new here; Finland banned Donald Duck for a time because of his pantless habit. Perhaps he could call Daisy Duck as a character witness? No, she always pranced around bottomless herself. I’ve got it! The defense will be senility. Donald is in his nineties. In duck years that makes him four centuries old. Old age can cover a multitude of sins. As the late Bob Hope noted, when a man gets old he forgets to zip up. When he gets very old he forgets to zip down. Leave the elderly duck alone!