News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:
U.S.—Somber members of the press offered their thoughts and prayers that someone would start some violence at the gun rights rally in Virginia today.
Reporters expressed their grief and condolences as the violence they hyped has so far failed to materialize.
“Nobody has so much as fired a shot. This is an unbelievable tragedy,” said one teary-eyed MSNBC reporter, clearly caught up in the anguish of the moment. “It’s tragic that we live in a country where reporters who are just minding their own business trying to push a narrative can have everything ripped away from them in an instant when protesters refuse to shoot at people.”
A CBS News reporter called for a moment of silence live on the air. “Let’s all take a minute and cry out to a non-specific deity of our choice that any second now, a miraculous shooting would occur.” When it did not occur, she began weeping and gnashing her teeth before ripping her suit jacket in despair. “WHY, GOD, WHY!?!”
Go here to read the rest.
Here’s an even more hard-hitting report from the Genesius Times, most reliable source of fake news on the internet:
https://genesiustimes.com/breaking-23-killed-at-virginia-white-supremacist-gun-rights-protest-dozens-injured/
“At least 23 people were killed at the white supremacist Second Amendment Rally in Richmond, Virginia, today…. Gov. Ralph Northam has issued a statement (saying) “we must do everything we can to end the mass killing of innocents!”
“UPDATE: We are being told that the killings didn’t happen at the rally but nearby at an undisclosed location….”
“UPDATE: Never mind. The ‘killings’ were abortions at the Richmond Planned Parenthood, so it’s okay. Totally not a problem. Gov. Northam has retracted his thoughts and prayers (for the victims of the mass murder)”.
That is fantastic Elaine!