Socialism For Thee, But Not For Me

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:


LAS VEGAS, NV—Bernie Sanders took criticism for owning three houses at last night’s Democratic debate. He defended himself eloquently, using the argument that “basically everyone who’s not a dumb, poor person has three houses” and that “having three houses is fun and convenient.”

But Sanders realized the blows were landing too effectively. So, to deflect attention away from his three houses, Sanders reportedly bought a fourth house, a quaint, 3,000-SF beachside summer home in Maine.

“Now they can’t say that I own three homes any longer!” Sanders said triumphantly as he clicked the Buy button on the website where socialists buy all their houses. “I’d love to see them try to use the ol’ three houses argument during the next debate! Bernie, old boy, we’ve done it again.”

Sanders then celebrated his home purchase the way he celebrates all his home purchases: with a bottle of authentic vodka from the USSR. “To socialism!” he said as he toasted his new home.

Go here to read the rest.  Now, now, Bee, it is in the grand tradition of Socialism for the leaders of a Socialist state to live high on the State Hog, while the proles grovel for crumbs.  Sanders is just a bit ahead of the game.

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  1. Loved Bernie’s defense of his houses, especially, his “summer camp”. “Hey! Everyone up here has a summer camp!” Ah. Well, I have one, too. It’s in a ripstop bag in my barn, complete with little metal pegs and a useful rainfly, next to my sleeping bags and my REI binto bag camp kitchen (complete with folding sink). No doubt, I should be re-educated.

  2. Totally OT, but I want to brag on my eldest, who opted to read 1984 for the other dystopian novel in her accelerated English course. The whole class had to read Fahrenheit 451, but you got to pick the second novel from a list. Instead of reach g so.e crisp like The Handmaid’s Tale, she picked Orwell. She read Animal Farm last summer with my encouragement.

    At least I’ve done something right in my life. I can die happy knowing my kids at least read Orwell.

  3. In Capitalism as in Socialism only a few will be in control. The difference is in Capitalism generally the few in control actually earn it by serving the many, but in Socialism the many serve the few who earned nothing.

  4. “At least I’ve done something right in my life. I can die happy knowing my kids at least read Orwell.”

    Good for your daughter Ernst! I have found that Orwell is a good intellectual companion to have while traversing this Vale of Tears.

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