Hand Washing Doesn’t Always Work

 

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:

ISRAEL—Bible scholars have agreed that Pontius Pilate didn’t wash his hands long enough or thoroughly enough to avoid taking any of the responsibility for the crucifixion of Jesus.

While many have speculated over Pilate’s exact handwashing technique, it’s now clear that he just ran a little water over his hands before shaking the droplets off. This was a common practice at the time, with men who just used the restroom even not washing their hands at all if no other man was in the bathroom to witness them. Luckily, we have outgrown these shortcomings in modern times.

“Pilate needed to scrub his hands with soap and warm water for at least 20 seconds to avoid taking any responsibility for the crucifixion,” said one researcher. “He should have sung ‘Happy Birthday’ twice or the ‘Full House’ theme song. Then, a good thorough drying with a paper towel or Dyson Airblade would have sealed the deal. As it stands, just running a little water over his hands wasn’t near enough to help him avoid judgment from God.”

Go here to read the rest.  To quote Lady Macbeth: What, will these hands ne’er be clean?

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3 Comments

  1. The infinite, ineffable, immutable, infallible, eternal truth is Jesus Christ, Second Person of the Supreme Sovereign Being and Son of God. Truth is a Person, an infinite, sovereign Person.
    Moral relativism denies the transcendent truth, the rational soul, the metaphysical, transcendent soul of the human being made in the image and likeness of God, “their Creator” (Declaration) with free will and freedom. “the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our (Constitutional) Posterity”. (Constitution)
    In denying infinite truth and the metaphysical side of mankind’s rational, immortal human soul, moral relativism imposes atheism on the people. Atheism is an ideology. Atheism is not a religion.
    Religion is a loving relationship with almighty God in thought, word, deed and peaceable assembly. Moral relativism introduces chaos, destruction of the common good and abrogation of civilization.
    Citizenship is good will for the common good. The citizen of good will cannot withstand the sickle of moral relativism hacking down the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth in a court of law.
    With DNA and ultrasound the perjury of abortion and the disenfranchisement of every father of his child is proven to be perjury in a court of law. Roe v. Wade never bore the burden of proof that the newly begotten, rational, transcendent, human soul with sovereign personhood was not at the conception of the human being.
    Marriage consists in the marital act. Sodomy is not the marital act.
    Transgendering neuters every human being. Another perjury in a court of law.
    Pornography is a lie about human sexuality. Sex is sacred. Sex is not profane. Pornography is perjury in a court of law.
    Minor children do not have informed consent until emancipation at eighteen years of age when the person can vote, drive, form contracts and serve in the armed forces. Minor children deserve the spiritual and corporal works of mercy, denied by atheism.
    Moral relativism is perjury in a court of law and atheism imposed on the people, by the government, making people subject to the lies and perjury of pure illogical ignorance.
    Only truth, infinite truth, infallible truth has freedom of speech in a court of law.
    Jesus Christ is infinite, infallible, eternal truth.

  2. “WHO” is the Holy Spirit of God. “I AM WHO I AM”. All persons because of the infinite Supreme Sovereign Being and being created in the image and likeness of the infinite Supreme Sovereign Being are sovereign persons with free will and rational soul, the breath of God in man, and must be referred to as “WHO”.
    Referring to any person as a “that” or a “which” refers to the person’s material, physical being denying his metaphysical self, his transcendent soul, his sovereign personhood.
    Denying the transcendent soul of a person can and does lead to treating any and every sovereign person as a beast of burden to the state and the state owning its constituents.
    Pontius Pilate denied the sovereign personhood of the Second Person of the Blessed Trinity, Jesus Christ when Pilate referred to Christ as “WHAT” (is truth?). Jesus Christ was crucified for blasphemy, for being the Son of the living, infinite Supreme Sovereign Being from WHOM all creation comes. Jesus Christ was put to death for blasphemy even while Pontius Pilate committed blasphemy against the three Persons of the Blessed Trinity and all mankind ever created in the image and likeness of our Supreme Sovereign Being.
    As sovereign persons made in the image and likeness of the infinite Supreme Sovereign Being, the transcendent metapysical soul of mankind is “WHO” “We, the people” are.
    The rest is atheism and blasphemy and totalitarianism.
    Our Easter resolution must be to address the infinite Supreme Sovereign Being as “WHO” and all finite, eternal, sovereign persons as “WHO”.

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