Good Idea

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:

U.S.—The Biden campaign is facing a real communication problem as Joe Biden’s speeches are growing more and more nonsensical. In order to overcome this challenge, aides have hired an interpreter to translate everything he says into normal, human-style English.

“My fellow Americans, pickle hamster meatloaf. The thing. Potato!” Biden began.

“My fellow Americans, thank you for being here this evening,” the interpreter translated.

Biden continued: “This pandemic has cost us more than 85,000 jobs as of today. Lives of millions of people. Millions of people. Millions of jobs.” He then nodded at the translator to interpret that into something resembling plain English.

“Uh… the, uh, pandemic has cost us tens of millions of jobs, and 85,000 have tragically lost their lives,” she interpreted frantically.

But she struggled to keep up as his speech got less and less coherent.

“Peanut butter M&Ms and my fellow U.S. Americans in the Iraq. Platypus!” was translated as “We must make sure Donald Trump does not continue to rob America of its future,” while “Farley farley farley farley farley hufaaaaaaaar!” was translated as “I am the best choice to beat Donald Trump.”

As Biden’s speech concluded, he said farewell: “Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z’ nourrwringmm!”

Go here to read the rest.  None too soon:

Of course we now have Joe trying to campaign virtually. How is that going?

Biden gave a version of his stump speech from the campaign trail, with unfortunate improvisations: “This country is really all about the American people,” he said. It felt like a mercy when, after he bade us goodbye, his image faded and a card came up advertising the Virtual Rally in Tampa, Florida, that had just ended.

The whole rally was, in short, a disaster—not a lasting or sizable one, but easily, in its comprehensiveness, the equal of any in my political experience, and I covered the 2016 Jeb Bush campaign. The fundamental problem was conceptual. Biden’s handlers approached the challenge of bringing a rally online too literally. They tried simply to list the elements of a typical rally and tick off the boxes—music, check; Pledge of Allegiance, check; speeches, check; candidate remarks, check; Ray-Bans, check—and then throw them up on the web, in serial fashion. For Zoom-campaign operatives, the trick in the future will be to somehow re-create the essence of a real-life rally, its excitement and spontaneity, without straining after a precise simulation.

No one should underestimate the devastating effects of technological incompetence. We know that a lot of former Obama-administration officials are getting involved in Biden’s campaign, which is perfectly understandable, but the Tampa rally suggests he’s brought back the tech crew from the first Obamacare website.

Go here to read the rest.  Perhaps Hilary Clinton provided the tech team?