Donald R. McClarey

Pretty Much

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee: WASHINGTON, D.C.—The Trump campaign has unveiled its 2020 campaign strategy of airing unedited footage of speeches and press conferences by far-left Democrats like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Ilhan Omar, Rashida Tlaib, and

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Donald R. McClarey

Mellow Like Jesus

For many will come in my name saying, I am Christ: and they will seduce many. Matthew 24: 5     News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   Christians these days are just the worst. They are

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Donald R. McClarey

The Congresswoman Will Pick Up the Tab

The Babylon Bee explains Democratic Socialism:   You can’t go into a Whole Foods or indie record store without hearing somebody talk about it: democratic socialism. Is it a radical new idea that we should try out in our nation,

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Donald R. McClarey

Sad But True Bee

How is it possible that such a system, long since rejected scientifically and now proved erroneous by experience, how is it, We ask, that such a system could spread so rapidly in all parts of the world? The explanation lies

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Donald R. McClarey

Walls Are a Socialist Girl’s Best Friend

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   U.S.—The nation’s Democratic leaders announced Tuesday they are reversing course on Trump’s proposed border wall, since “it will keep people in once we switch to socialism.”   “We thought the

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Donald R. McClarey

Antifa v. Isis

Communism and Fascism remind me of the North Pole and the South Pole. They are at opposite ends of the earth, but if you woke up at either Pole tomorrow morning you could not tell which one it was. Perhaps

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Donald R. McClarey

1775: War in the Lunar Colonies

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   WASHINGTON, D.C.—In his July 4 address to the nation, President Trump took a moment to praise the American soldiers in the Revolutionary War for “kicking the crap out of the

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Donald R. McClarey

Through a Glass Darkly

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee: PORTLAND, OR—A member of Antifa, Dustin Day, injured himself over the weekend while attempting to punch a nazi he spotted. “So I had my mask on and was ready to fight

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Donald R. McClarey

Brothers Under the Hood

    David French at National Review Online recalls the anti-masking laws that were used to fight a prior group that served as a terrorist arm of the Democrat party:     I’d urge everyone to read my colleague Jim

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Donald R. McClarey

Biden For the Defeat Alex

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee: MIAMI, FL—A major cave-in occurred after all Democratic candidates scrambled to the far left side of the debate stage Thursday evening. As the debate kicked off, Bernie Sanders immediately ran

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Donald R. McClarey

Parable

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   NEW YORK, NY—Greg Klein was walking home when he saw an injured man on the side of the road. Much like the good Samaritan in Jesus’s parable, Klein acted swiftly.

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Donald R. McClarey

Boob Bait

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   U.S.—The 347 Democratic presidential candidates currently running announced Monday their new plan to attract voters to their platforms: simply to dangle stacks of cash over their heads on a fishing

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Donald R. McClarey

Concentrate Congresswoman

  News that I missed courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a video to her constituents Monday evening, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez compared mandatory math classes in public schools to “concentration camps.” Ocasio-Cortez made several comparisons between public school

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Donald R. McClarey

Reality Has a Well Known Conservative Bias

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   U.S.—Popular fact-checking site Snopes.com confirmed Wednesday they are debuting a new “Factually inaccurate but morally right” fact check result for claims they don’t want to debunk because they coincide with

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Donald R. McClarey

Kermit, We Hardly Knew Ye

      News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   HOLLYWOOD, CA—Protesters crowded around the Jim Henson Company lot in Hollywood Monday to protest Kermit the Frog and his “obvious ties to Pepe,” the internet-famous frog meme

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Donald R. McClarey

About Time

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   WASHINGTON, D.C.—Shortly after Joe Biden promised to cure cancer if he is elected president, presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren attempted to one-up her opponent, promising to cure smallpox as one

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Donald R. McClarey

Make America Blind Again

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   WASHINGTON, D.C.—Speaking on The View, presidential candidate Joe Biden promised to bring the nation back to an era when the media pretended the president didn’t have any scandals. Biden pointed out that

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Donald R. McClarey

Nazis

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   SAN BRUNO, CA—Continuing their ongoing efforts to rid their platform of hate speech, content managers at YouTube have decided to remove all videos featuring or referencing “The Soup Nazi,”

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Donald R. McClarey

Hate Chicken

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   WASHINGTON, D.C.—Under intense pressure from their left-leaning constituents to do something about the dangerous, Christian-founded restaurant chain, Democrats in the House of Representatives unveiled legislation Tuesday that would make it

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Donald R. McClarey

With Trump Anything is Possible

“Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.” Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)    

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Donald R. McClarey

Truth In Advertising

These communities, by their representatives in old Independence Hall, said to the whole world of men: “We hold these truths to be self evident: that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable

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Donald R. McClarey

Moloch Hates Georgia

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   ATLANTA, GA—In further backlash against Georgia’s heartbeat bill, which bans abortion after a fetal heartbeat is detected, the Canaanite god Moloch says he will reconsider his presence in Georgia

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Donald R. McClarey

All Are Welcome!

Lest we forget at least an over the shoulder acknowledgment to the very first radical: from all our legends, mythology and history (and who is to know where mythology leaves off and history begins – or which is which), the

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Donald R. McClarey

The Almighty Has His Own Purposes

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee: WASHINGTON, D.C.—Trying to get to the bottom of how and why President Trump was elected, House Democrats issued a subpoena to the Almighty God to force Him to testify in

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Donald R. McClarey

Darth Vader for Choice

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   Hey, loyal subjects of the Empire. Darth Vader here, Dark Lord of the Sith and renowned pro-choice advocate. Plenty of buzz has been going around the comlinks about if

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Donald R. McClarey

Saving Lives

Whoever destroys a single life is considered by Scripture to have destroyed the whole world, and whoever saves a single life is considered by Scripture to have saved the whole world. Parma Italy, mid-13th century codex of the Mishnah  

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Donald R. McClarey

Personally Opposed

“What we want, and all we want, is to have with us the men who think slavery wrong. But those who say they hate slavery, and are opposed to it, but yet act with the Democratic party — where are

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Donald R. McClarey

Mr. Ratburn, We Hardly Knew Ye

News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   ARLINGTON, VA—In a controversial new episode of educational cartoon Arthur, PBS showed the eponymous character’s teacher, Mr. Ratburn, coming out as a conservative Christian. The episode kicked off the show’s latest

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Donald R. McClarey

That’s Entertainment!

    News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   WASHINGTON, D.C.—After a long day in the office Monday, congressional representative Rashida Tlaib reportedly popped a bag of popcorn, settled back into her chair, and watched her favorite

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Donald R. McClarey

Sounds About Right

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   U.S.—According to a new report performed by the American Public Health Association, all six men who are sexually attracted to feminists are already suffering deeply from the ongoing sex

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Donald R. McClarey

Lysistrata Refused to Comment

News that I missed courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   HOLLYWOOD, CA—In bold move intended to powerfully virtue-signal about abortion rights, Charmed actress Alyssa Milano has called for a strike on starring in any movies or TV shows. “Our reproductive rights are

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Donald R. McClarey

Jesus Hates Diversity

News that I missed courtesy of The Babylon Bee:   PORTLAND, OR—A leading New Testament scholar working at Unified Unity Divinity School has published a paper criticizing Jesus for a lack of diversity among the apostles He chose in the

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Donald R. McClarey

Sister Mary Aquinas Would Have Beaten Him to a Pulp

  News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee: HARRISBURG, PA—Pennsylvania’s favorite pro-abortion legislator, Brian Sims, wanted to show he was tough. While most guys would join a local MMA club or luchador circuit, Sims isn’t most guys. He had

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